Aaron Sorkin, in the one and only Christmas episode of his really well done, but totally unappreciated, only one season series "Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip", had D.L. Hughley's character, Simon Styles, speak a clever, funny and, for my drachmas, spot on line of diety dialogue.
"Jesus was born in North Africa. How come in paintings he always looks like one of the Bee Gees?"
Whether you're a mother or whether you're a brother, that's a holiday ha ha.
It popped into my head when I spied this little mcnugget amongst the other mcnuggets in an online fluff piece entitled "17 Facts About McDonald's You Might Not Know."
11. McDonald's' iconic golden arches are recognized by more people than the cross
A survey by Sponsorship Research International found that 88 percent could identify the arches and only 54 percent could name the Christian cross, according to Fast Food Nation.
The obvious cause and effect in my particular parietal lobe goes a little something like this.
As Christianity continues to valiently endeavor to bring once, and future, sheep into the fold, it might benefit from a little image retooling to assist in reaching a wider audience.
Or congregation, as the case may be.
Because if only half the flock recognizes the cross, but eight in ten acknowledge the arches, one need not be a marketing school major to see the opportunity here.
Golden opportunity, so to speak.
Obviously, some adjustments will be required in our way of life.
Getting used to singing "The Old Rugged Arches" will take some getting used to.
And "Hamburgler loves me / this I know" might grate on the ear or two of a purist or two.
But, as many hard working men and women of God might offer, whatever it takes to get posteriors in pews, amen?
Amen.
And from the chalice half full folder, how about the fresh, exciting holiday production Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice could crank out with a new, fully adored revival...
"Mayor McCheese, Superstar".
And just so we're clear..(in this season, actually, midnight clear)...
This whole idea being run up the flag pole, or church steeple, as the case may be, is respectfully intended as a suggestion that might actually bring people to the son of God.
Ergo, to God.
And, as the Paul who wrote Silly Love Songs, as opposed to the Paul who wrote letters to the Corinthians, would add.
"What's wrong with that / I'd like to know?"
If you find yourself offended at this point (and, just sayin', but if you were going to be offended at all here, what took you so long?), I can only offer you this.
No one with any sense of reverence would ever seriously suggest that we denigrate the symbolism of the cross by paying equal tribute to the arches.
But if your righteousness doesn't become indignant at the idea of sending out cards each December with a picture of Barry Gibb on the cover, why get all holier than thou about the idea of adding one more name to the list of iconic holiday heroes.
Jesus Christ.
Santa Claus.
Ronald McDonald.
In that order.
Amen?
Amen.
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