Let alone a lack of any real answer at all.
And while, in the aftermath of Newtown, the search for an answer is instinctive, even primal, the bubble that keeps floating back to the center of the metaphorical carpenter's level is equal parts inevitable and unacceptable.
There is no easy answer.
Gun control naturally comes out of the box first and loudest any time something like this happens.
Next, mental illness and the need to deal with it more effectively.
From that point on, solutions, suggestions, ideas and/or demands of all shapes, colors and sizes fly like proverbial shit in the direction of the proverbial wall in the passionate hope that something, anything, will stick.
And we won't have to ever again wake up to breaking news that breaks our hearts.
One solution/suggestion/idea/demand that's making some noise right now is allowing teachers to be armed.
Actress/writer Marsha Warfield posted her response to that suggestion on her Facebook page today.
"...We would really rather arm teachers than restrict gun ownership? And, we call ourselves civilized?..."
First, I realize she's asking rhetorically, but, frankly, Marsha, at this point, of all the things I'm inclined to "call us" these days, civilized isn't the first word that pops.
Truth be told, that one is in danger of dropping out of the top ten.
My digression notwithstanding, though, I've been thinking about the whole notion of arming teachers, a thinking about that would have been unthinkable to me just what seems like a precious few years ago, and in coming to the conclusion I'm coming to, I've managed to pull off something I thought long ago impossible to do anymore.
Surprise myself.
Allow me to allow you to peek inside the process.
Picture this.
Dawn Hochsprung, principal of Sandy Hook Elementary School is in a meeting with the school psychologist and a parent when they all hear noises in the hallway, noises that instinct, if nothing else, immediately indentifies as gunfire.
Without a moment's hestiation, Hochsprung and Mary Sherlach, the school psychologist, head out the door and into the hallway to confront what they, again most likely instinctively, knew was a gunman.
Reports tell us that both Hochsprung and Sherlach were shot to death as they gave ther last, best all to trying to stop the gunman.
Empty handed, with nothing but adrenalin, compassion and a courage most of us can't even imagine, they ran right at the evil in front of them.
And they were left dead or dying on the floor as evil fired his weapons, stepped over them and continued on through rooms and hallways killing every living soul in his twisted sight.
Until evil heard the sound of police sirens and, as evil is wont to do, gutlessly killed itself.
Now picture this.
Dawn Hochsprung, principal of Sandy Hook Elementary School is in a meeting with the school psychologist and a parent when they all hear noises in the hallway, noises that instinct, if nothing else, immediately indentifies as gunfire.
Without a moment's hestiation, Hochsprung and Mary Sherlach, the school psychologist, head out the door and into the hallway to confront what they, again most likely instinctively, know is a gunman.
Either Hochsprung or Sherlach, or possibly even both, having been properly trained, certified and liscensed, enter that hallway, having unholstered the Glocks they keep discreetly out of sight but always ready should the worst ever happen.
Seeing that the worst is, in fact, happening, one, or both, of these brave souls assume a trained stance and fire their weapons repeatedly, perhaps being wounded, perhaps even fatally, but, within a reasonable possiblity, not before killing evil in that hallway.
And, with their actions, giving the community of Newtown the Christmas gift of a school full of precious children and teachers walking out the door, scared, shaken and traumatized.
But alive.
Critics of the idea will offer that my scenario is, at best, wishful thinking.
Or an unrealistic fairy tale.
Or, even perhaps worse, an admittance that we are regressing as a culture and society and the need to return to the untamed West days of lock and load, strap em' on and shoot em' up is a tragedy.
There was a time in my own life when I would have agreed with that point of view.
That time has passed.
All that is necessary, it is written, for evil to flouish is for good men to do nothing.
Dawn Hochsprung and Mary Sherlach, and in their own ways, Vicki Soto and Rachel D'Avino, most assuredly did not do nothing.
But is leveling the playing field in the game against evil more of a tragedy than the idea of six and seven year old bodies lying on the floor filled with bullet holes?
We all once lived in a world where school hallways were safe.
We don't live in that world anymore.
And if I don't have the power to turn back the hands of time, then, with an admittedly heavy heart, I hear my head very clearly telling me that I need to face facts and live in the world as it is.
And while I will continue to hope, suggest, support, and pray for the answer, I'm not naive enough to ignore the liklihood that its only a matter of time before evil appears in another hallway, a school, a day care center, a maternity ward.
And that brave people will head out the door and into the hallway to confront what they, again most likely instinctively, know is a gunman.
We shouldn't send them out that door empty handed, with nothing but adrenalin, compassion and a courage most of us can't even imagine.
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